Anne's Writing World

 I lost my mind last night.  I yelled at my kid again who wetted the bed last night. I think the reason I lost it was I heard my husband yelled first, and I was interrupted during a Korean drama. Deep down my mind, I really want to finish the drama but my little boy wetted again. What's worse, my husband had a temper at him which made a scene like  I was a bad mom because I left my child in the bed to enjoy my own time.  I said something really bad last night again, and it made me feel really terrible.  (Something like I would want to leave the family..) I couldn't sleep. I don't have energy. I feel bad.  I need to put myself together to face my job which also consumes a lot of energy emotionally.  Is it possible that I spend too much energy at work, and I don't save some for my family.  Why is it so hard?

Last night, I yelled at my four-year-old, just because he didn't want to eat. Well, what came out my mouth was for my husband, mostly. Recently, I feel restricted. My mind is eager to shout, soar and fly away.  I can't smile and feel depressed sometimes.  Not because my job. I love my job. I love the satisfaction that it brings me. I love the group of kind and considerate people who can catch me and support me. I love my family, my caring husband and two beautiful sons. Why can't I smile?  What happened to me?